I made great progress today, getting closer and closer to owning my body, and even closer to owning my sexuality. It's my body and I will use it when i want to. Made it swiftly to the second knuckle, and there was virtually no burning sensation. I wonder how I'll know when I've made it through? Like, when does it switch from progress to over? It's hard for me to believe that people put things up there, big things. I mean, babies come out of there! And here I am celebrating over half of a tiny little finger.
Life is funny like that.
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It's strange, compared to last summer my life is tenfold more stressful than this summer, and yet I feel a lot better. Maybe it's because i've just given up or something. I'm just so tired of all of the crap. The dysfunction, the isolation, the crying, the self-deprivation. I just want it to end. I want new experiences, new emotions, I want the gross, dirty and humiliating life that everyone else can freely indulge in. And I think I'm on my way there.
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