What the hell twilight?

What kind of a book series involves a man falling in love with a newborn baby?

A really, frighteningly popular one. One read by thousands of impressionable teens that don't know what love is yet. Teens who will never get a clear and non-fucked up message about love from any other media. It makes me want to write a book for young teens with a normal view about love and relationships. But then again, what is normal even?

I can tell you what isn't: a grow adult thinking a baby is his soul-mate. What happens if she grows up and decides she doesn't want to be with him? He won't have another soul-mate, so she'll essentially be screwing him over for life, even after all the time he spent watching over her as a baby. He waited so patiently, and thus, deserves a reward. And what kind of a force unintentionally makes an adult fall in love with a baby? Does he really like her? How could he? It's not her looks or her personality, she's hardly existed in the world yet! Is it because he thinks she will grow up to be a watered down version of her mother? I mean come on, how long is he gonna have to wait before true love can happen?

It's just all kinds of messed up. But it gives me some food for thought on normal relationship.

So I used my mind, and I used my hand, it was what I want to do

I really want to do just what my body needs to
If I could just hold all the thoughts in my head and just keep them for you
I want to do just what my body needs to
If I want I just might do what my body needs to
If I could just purge all the urges that I have and keep them for you


Adult sexuality is a complicated thing. Heck, sexuality is a complicated thing. Especially when it involves all the issues I have. I mean how are you supposed to be a sexual being when you can't have the type of sex that society as a whole has branded as normal?

Written a long time ago, but just for reference

Ground Rules:

No Lashing out at me: I am not the one who’s in the wrong here

You must be willing to hear me out

No jumping to conclusions

No putting words or intention in my mouth

First off, you cannot reason with someone while they are having a full scale mental breakdown. A breakdown lies not in rational thought and resides at the place where pain and illogical intersect. I envy you for not knowing what that is like, but I am glad for you. Breakdown is not a good place to be. But it means that your specialty cannot lie anywhere but sympathy, and not in empathy. You do not understand what it is like to be that desperate. Desperation is a scary thing, uncertainty is a scary thing, not feeling safe and secure anywhere. Burning in the fiery torment of pain from which you see no end. You don’t know these things, I can see that for sure. I am glad for that. But you must be willing to open your eyes and see it in others. But you see, this is complicated, because now I have given you a very personal part of myself. Something that cannot be taken back. You have seen me at the apex of all things bad. It is a part that almost no one on earth has seen, it is a dark and frightening part of myself. The thought of you holding me while I was so vulnerable is beautiful and touching to me. However, it leaves out a very important part:

The part where that should have never happened. I should have never been pushed to that breaking point. We should have talked it out like mature adults in a safe space at a time where it was reasonable. Instead of cornering me in a place that was literally inescapable, humiliating. The part where you literally forced your opinion of us onto me, we didn’t break up, You dumped me. You dumped me knowing full well where I stood at that point and time. At a time that you knew was important to me, on a day that you knew was stressful already, but you did it anyways.

And it FUCKING HURT. I entrusted you with my feelings, I made myself extremely vulnerable to you, I laid myself out there, I allowed you to push that envelope.