I haven't posted because I have barely had any feelings, and now I'm barely awake so this post wont make sense
Except for horny, if that an emotion. Very horny.
I reached out and reconnected with a ton of people lately. It was probably an awful life choice. I reconnected with all my exes. It was interesting.
Two months ago, I joined tinder and met a guy. He asked me to rim him. I did. It was very nice. But everything else about it was kinda meh.
Then I met another guy. Really liked him. He invited me back to his place. I said yes. He freaks out and says he can't have sex on the first date and then I got really excited when he rubbed my jeans and had a huge orgasm and was embarrassed. Then he unmatched and stopped talking to me. Oops.
I told my ex fiance I still loved him but I don't think I really want to date him again. We had sex. But then he hasn't changed at all. He still has a girlfriend but they are open. I think that's fucking stupid and I'm pretty turned off from him. I kind of don't want to date him again right now.
I went on a date tonight and the guy was really sweet. I liked talking to him. I had a cold but he still went out with me. We went back to his place to talk, and we did for awhile. Then before I knew it we were naked. It was rather nice though. We managed not to have sex. I guess we are saving that for the second date. God dammit. Ill probably start dating him...I suck at having casual sex apparently. He was really nice. His body is disturbingly similar to my last boyfriends though. Its really uncanny.
I reconnected with my old best friend who apparently has vaginismus now. I didn't really want to tell her about my virginity losing, but I think she needed my help. So I did. I overcame my problem. I poured my blood sweat and tears into fixing my body so I could enjoy my life. And it was hard as fuck and I thought it was impossible. But I did it. And each time I do it I like it more. And I'm less scared.
Thus concludes my sexual escapes for the past three months.
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