Monday, December 23, 2013

Sexual frustration

Is it possible to die of sexual frustration? Cause I feel I'm getting close. Seriously, I'm miserable.

Tuesday, December 17, 2013

Protip

Orgasms help relieve period cramps. Just an FYI.

I'm trying hard, but really I'm just losing it lately. Had some serious suicidal ideations which forced me to back up and reexamine my life. I'm very much not attracted to a lot of people I used to feel strongly for, as well as 100% of the people I meet on OkCupid. Feeling very confused and overwhelmed but a lot of intangible things. I'm just trying to survive the holidays and fix my 'problem'.

Friday, December 6, 2013

Back in The Game

After going very far back in the progress. I'm back to the number 4 dilator sort of. But I have no one to practice on. Everybody is annoying me. So deceptive and dismissive of my feelings.

I had a really difficult holiday break. Having spent every holiday of my life hanging out with my grandfather. The silence is deafening. And here I am alone again. Wondering if I'm going crazy or just feeling the normal range of feelings any person would under these circumstances.

I would just like a support partner right now. Nothing crazy. Maybe even like a casual sex partner. Somebody who was really kind and sweet but just got beaten down in life so badly that they can't feel anymore. And they just want to share a few quick breaths and a groan so that they can feel human again.

I wish I could feel human again.