Going to the GYNO on Monday

Gonna have my first pap smear on Monday. Its pretty overdue so I hope everything turns out okay. The appointment lady on the phone was really weird and was like OMG YOU NEVER HAD A PAP SMEAR BEFORE. I wanted to be like...dude my vagina was a brick wall for the first 23 years of my life. I've tried at least 3 times to get a pap without success. I think I can do it this time. Looking forward to facing off on what is more or less the final 'vagina frontier' in my training. I haven't done any practice for it. But if I'm lucky I might have some sex this weekend. And that's kinda like a dilator right? A fun sexy dilator with a person attached...but still. Its gotta count for something.